Baby Makes Three
by writeaddict
Summary: Jim Kirk, womanizer extraordinaire, has an unexpected kid. All of his experiences from full blown panic to elation in balancing star ship captain with fatherhood.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek, I just fic it.

Baby Makes Three- Chapter 1

Jim was about to board the Enterprise when his name was called. He had been on shore leave on earth for two weeks and was about to get back to his mission. He turned around and was surprised to see a tall, leggy, brunette with gray eyes carrying a kid.

"Sarah?"

She fixed him with a glare, "Wow. The infamous Jim Kirk remembers my name."

Jim grinned, "Yeah, of course. You did that _awesome_ thing with your mouth and you were _tireless_."

The glare went up a few notches, "Nice to know I'm remembered."

Jim gave the child in her arms a side look, "I'd ask if you want to catch up but you look busy and I have to go."

She gave him a bright smile that made him wary, "Well, see, that's what I'm here about,"

She strode up to him and plunked the child in his arms, "She is _your_ problem now."

"What!" Jim spluttered, "Why is she my problem? I really need to go now, I have no time to hold your baby."

Sarah walked up to the baby bag that was on the floor before handing them to Jim, "The folder inside has everything you need to know about her. Have a nice life," she started walking away.

Jim half ran after her, clutching the baby and the bag, "How do I know this kid is even mine?"

Sarah didn't even bother to stop walking, "Do all the DNA tests you'd like. Throw her out the airlock."

Jim hurried after her, "Wait!"

Sarah kept walking so Jim shouted his question, "What's her name?"

Sarah finally stopped and looked over her shoulder at him, the smile she gave him was bitter sweet, "I thought I'd leave that privilege to you."

She disappeared into the crowd and Jim sighed, looking down at the baby, "What are we going to do with you?"

The baby abruptly started screaming.

A/N: This is for the Baby Challenge on the kink meme which can be found here: http:/st-xi-kink-meme . / ?thread= 7424768#t7424768 (just delete the spaces). I would like a beta that has some knowledge of Star Trek since mine only extends as far as the movie, if anyone is interested please let me know. Review please.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek.

Baby Makes Three- Chapter 2

The moment Jim arrived on the transporter pad Bones did a double take and scowled. He strode up to Jim and took the screaming baby out of his arms, cradling her and rocking.

Jim let out a sigh of relief, "Thank you, she wouldn't stop crying," Jim stared at him for a moment before he huffed, "Oh, so she doesn't cry with you. Isn't that great."

Bones glared at him, "Scotty said you were beaming up two but is this some kind of joke? Because it isn't funny."

Jim shook his head, "No, it's apparently my daughter. I'll need you to do a DNA test, by the way."

Bones shook his head, "A ship is no place to raise a child."

Jim glared back at him for a moment before sighing, "And where am I supposed to put her, hmm? You tell me because I'm very open to suggestions right now."

"I don't know, who's her mother?"

"Sarah. Remember the leggy brunette I was telling you about that had that wicked thing she did with her mouth?"

"No," Bones replied, "They _all_ have something. With how many girls you've been through I can't say I _do_ remember."

Jim smirked, "Yeah, well she was particularly good," he frowned again, "And she dumped the kid on me, she doesn't want the baby."

Bones shook his head, "I'm surprised something like this didn't happen earlier, frankly. Can you send the child to your mom or do you have any other family that would be willing to take her?"

Jim glared at him and nearly snatched the baby back, "My mother wasn't the greatest so there is no way I'm sending her my kid, besides she's on a mission for Starfleet too. And I haven't talked to my brother in years so the answer to your question would be no."

"And just how do you plan on taking care of her and doing missions at the same time?"

"I'll figure something out."

"Uhura! Just the person I was looking for." Jim smiled charmingly as he held the squirming kid.

Uhura looked at him, suspicious. "What do you want Jim?"

"Would you mind taking care of the kid? I have some, some…captainy duties to do."

"And why are you asking me this?"

"You're a woman, you're better suited to taking care of kids than me."

Uhura's face turned cold and Jim tried again, "Um, you're awesome?"

"No," she replied, "You're going to have to take care of the kid at some point instead of foisting her off on people."

The baby chose that moment to let out a wail and Jim winced, jiggling her up and down. The kid just cried harder.

"Come on, stop crying."

Uhura rolled her eyes and snatched the screaming baby out of his arms. "Really, Jim? Did you even check to see if she's hungry or anything?"

Jim looked at her, panic in his blue eyes and backed away, "I'll just leave this to you, Uhura." He sprinted away, yelling his thanks over his shoulder.

Jim made his way to the Sick Bay, the screaming child in his arms. He sighed, it was all she seemed to do around him. And people wondered why he was always letting others take care of her.

He entered and made his way to Bones, holding out the shrieking baby, "Please do something. God, she hasn't stopped crying since I got her."

"Then why'd you take her? I warned you about this, didn't I? It's been two weeks and all you've done is coerce other people into taking care of her for you."

"It's not my fault, Bones. Fuck, I have no idea what to do with a baby and honestly, does it seem like leaving one with me is a good idea?"  
>Bones' eyes darkened and Jim automatically knew that was the wrong thing to say, he tried to backpedal but Bones had had enough.<p>

Bones growled, "No idea what to do with a kid, huh? Well maybe you shoulda kept it in your pants then if you weren't prepared to deal with this possibility. For fucks sake, Jim! It's a baby! She needs milk, cuddling, dry diapers, and some toys to keep her attention. How hard can that fucking be? The universe isn't about you so grow the fuck up. At least you get to be around your kid! So stop being a jackass and think about what it feels like when both your parents are absent or don't love you! And for Christ sake, give the kid a fucking name!"

Bones snatched the kid out of lax arms and cooed softly at her, getting a bottle of milk from the replicator. He sat down and started feeding her before looking up at Jim with angry green eyes. "Get out."

Jim paled and stared at him for a moment. When Bones didn't take back his words or say anything else, he blinked, nodded, and shakily made his way out the door back to his quarters. He took out his PADD and pulled up everything he could find about taking care of children and read long into the night.

A/N: If anyone that has knowledge of Star Trek would like to beta this please let me know.


	3. Chapter 3

Baby Makes Three- Chapter 3

When Jim went to pick up his daughter in the morning and couldn't find Bones, he realized the man was avoiding him. It wasn't until Jim was in the middle of a shift on the Bridge that the man in question arrived, toting his baby.

Bones handed the sleeping infant to him and Jim met his eyes briefly before looking away. "Thank you," he said softly.

When Bones merely nodded in response, Jim's hopes dropped. It seemed that their friendship might not be reparable, that he had made too big of a mistake.

"Her name," Jim whispered, "It's Aundri Georgia Kirk." He paused a moment before adding, "I'm sorry."

Bones shook his head and sighed, and his voice was gruff when he finally spoke. "I may have been a bit harsh before," he admitted, "But, Jim, it's not as hard as you think it is. If you'd give it a try instead of running away as soon as she cries, she'd get used to you. We will help you if you need it but we're not that kid's parent. She needs you."

"I'm going to try," Jim replied, voice soft.

"Good," Bones stated. When Jim still didn't quite meet Bones eyes, Bones sighed. "I'm not going anywhere, kid."

Jim looked up at him in relief, and smiled.

Break/Break/Break

The first time Jim walked into the mess with Aundri against his chest in a sling and a baby bag in his hand, the room went silent. Everyone stared at him before the whispers began. It wasn't long until the whispers turned into a dull roar. Jim met the stares head-on and tried not to be completely mortified.

When he pulled a bottle out of the bag, tested the temperature, and started feeding Aundri. He was rewarded with Bones' smile.

Break/Break/Break

The next problem occurred later that day. He was in his command chair when he smelled it, he wrinkled his nose and checked to make sure he was right but his suspicions were confirmed. Aundri had pooed. He resisted the urge to run away screaming– he was going to do this right, damn it– and made his way to the Sick Bay.

"Bones," he called out as he entered, "I need your help."

Bones made his way over to Jim, "What is it?"

Jim made a face before he asked his question, "How do you change a diaper?"

Bones stared at him and raised an eyebrow, "You've never changed a diaper before?" he asked incredulously.

Jim frowned at him, "Of course not," he told him, "I was my mom's youngest child."

Bones just frowned right back. "No," he replied, "I mean you've had Aundri for two weeks, and you've never once changed her diaper?"

"Uh…" Jim paused, trying to find a way to answer without sounding completely stupid. "No," he finally managed. When Bones continued to frown at him, Jim shifted the sling to his back, and crossed his arms, "Look," he said, "I'm trying to change that. I'm asking for your help with the diaper so that I know how to do it later, if you're not going to help me just say so."

Bones led him to one of the more private biobeds and pulled a piece of the disposable paper over the surface, "Set her on the bed," he instructed.

Jim took Aundri out of her sling and placed her on the bed.

"Okay," Bones told him, "Now, remove the diaper, and try to make sure that nothing spills over onto the bed."

Jim did as he was told, trying not to inhale the stench– he failed.

"All right," Bones continued, "You need to wipe her to make sure she's clean – make sure you do so thoroughly."

Jim reached into the bag and pulled out the wipes and a fresh diaper.

"Pull out the baby powder and baby lotion too."

Jim pulled out the listed items and wiped Aundri. He grimaced when it took more than two wipes. Bones was looking at him with poorly concealed amusemen, and Jim made a face at him.

"You'd have to learn it at some point, kid," Bones informed him wryly, "When you finish wiping her up put on the lotion before sprinkling on some baby powder. The wipes can go in the dirty diaper. Less mess that way."

When Aundri was clean again, Jim put her back in the sling.

"You might want to walk around with her a bit," Bones suggested, "The rocking motions will be soothing to her and she's at an age where babies mostly sleep. Enjoy it while it lasts."

Jim sent a panicked look in the doctor's direction, and Bones' laughter echoed behind him as he made his way out of the Sick Bay.

Break/Break/Break

"Jim… Jim? Jim? JIM!"

Jim jerked out of his reverie and looked at the bridge crew, all of whom were staring at him. He coughed and prayed that his cheeks weren't red, "Yes?"

"Captain," Spock asked, "Are you well?"

"I'm fine, Spock," Jim replied.

The bridge crew exchanged looks that indicated they didn't believe him.

"What was it that you wanted to say before?" Jim asked, frowning at them.

"Captain," Spock announced, "We have an exploratory mission on planet Taurin and we are currently in orbit. It is M-class. I would like to suggest that four security members, Uhura, and myself go."

Jim absently stroked Aundri's soft hair, and nodded his agreement. "Okay."

The crew looked at him with varying levels of shock. Even Spock rose an eyebrow, it all but disappeared into his hairline as he asked, "Captain, you do not wish to go?"

Jim glanced around at his Bridge Crew before looking away and sighing. "I do want to go," he replied quietly, "But Aundri needs me,"

Uhura smiled at him before moving toward him and planting a kiss on Aundri's head, the baby gurgled happily at the attention. "Captain," Uhura stated, "I do believe you're growing up." With that pronouncement, she headed towards the turbo lift to go to the transportation room.

Jim looked down at the baby in his arms, the child he had come to love. Things weren't easy. No, there were definitely hard times, and he had to sacrifice some of the things he used to do simply because she was around now, but he couldn't actually say that he really regretted it. He sighed. That didn't mean that he didn't miss things though.

A/N: And here is the next chapter. I wanted to thank AnneMary for beta-ing, she did an _amazing_ job. Happy New Year everyone.


End file.
